The Cattleman's Special Delivery Page 10
There was an awkward silence and her heart picked up pace. She knew very well that they had no choice but to forget the kiss. Reece was right. If they’d been in the city they might have had a fling, a bit of harmless fun. But it was pretty hard to have a light-hearted, casual affair when you were stranded in an isolated outback homestead.
She wasn’t sure what she should do now. Stand here bursting with tension? Say goodnight? Go make that cup of tea?
Still uncertain, she pushed away from the railing, but as she did Reece reached for her hand.
His touch sent a streak of fire scorching through her.
And then his fingers closed around hers, sending a second heatwave flashing over her skin.
The tension was electric, but neither of them spoke. It was as if they didn’t want to break the spell with anything as dangerous as words. And then, Reece tugged gently at her hand.
And it was too hard to stay sensible. She was powerless to resist.
Any lingering awkwardness melted. His arms tightened around her, crushing her doubts and questions. She was smiling as he kissed her forehead, melting as his mouth found her cheek, her ear lobe, her chin, then everywhere...
She tilted her head back so he could kiss her throat, and then his lips trailed lower to the neckline of her nightie.
She gasped as his thumbs gently grazed her breasts through the thin fabric.
‘Your room?’ he whispered.
‘Please.’
* * *
Of course it was wonderful, and of course they were pleased with themselves. After weeks of suppressing this need, they could at last lie skin to skin, could at last touch and taste to their hearts’ content.
Jess’s room smelled of cinnamon and vanilla, and they made love on crisp, clean sheets, and she was pleased that she didn’t feel the slightest bit awkward or shy. Reece’s touch sent a happy charge running through her and everything felt natural and perfectly right.
She loved the giving and the taking, loved the sighing and smiling as they soared together and clung together. Till at last, they plunged from a great height.
Together.
* * *
Afterwards.
They lay, limbs loose and relaxed. Sleepy.
‘Wow,’ Jess said softly.
‘Yeah...’ Reece drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. ‘Wow’s the word.’
She smiled broadly in the darkness. ‘And thank goodness Rosie didn’t wake up.’
It was possibly the wrong thing to say. At the mention of the baby, Reece hitched up on one elbow. ‘I guess it’s time I got back to my room.’
She considered asking him to stay. She would love to go to sleep beside him, and to wake beside him. But that was probably asking too much. After all, without actually saying the words, they’d more or less agreed this wasn’t the beginning of a real relationship. Whatever it was, it was casual.
As he rolled from her bed Jess closed her eyes. ‘Goodnight, Reece.’
Even though she knew it must happen, she didn’t want to watch him walk away from her.
The warm pressure of his lips on her forehead was a surprise.
‘’Night, Jess.’
Such a tiny gesture, but after he’d gone she felt so much better.
* * *
In his room, Reece sat on the edge of his bed, staring hard at a faint patch of moonlight on the floorboards, as if somehow it could provide him with answers or reassurance.
I swore that wouldn’t happen.
But, surely, no man in his right mind could turn away from a girl as lovely and tempting as Jess.
Just the same, he wouldn’t allow himself to be totally blown away by tonight. Yes, he was walking on air, but now it was time to throw out an anchor. Time to get real, to accept that nothing that felt this good could last.
Jess might be utterly bewitching, and tonight with her had been far and away the best sex he’d ever known, but now he had to get their fabulous lovemaking into perspective. Had to remember that Jess wasn’t here to stay. She was here primarily to care for his father, and if Michael passed away she’d shoot through.
No question.
Reece was regrettably familiar with this pattern of women leaving, although, in his twenties, he’d been more optimistic about his chances of lasting happiness. Despite the never-forgotten desolation of his mother’s desertion, he’d been confident he would be luckier than his dad.
He’d brought girlfriends home to Warringa. Girls he’d met on city-breaks, or on holidays, girls he’d met at parties, at mates’ weddings, at the races...
Picking up girls had been the easy part, and they’d arrived here bright-eyed and eager, claiming to be in love with his ‘cowboy’ lifestyle. Some had begged to stay on, but their rosy expectations had never been close to reality. Averill had become depressed by the isolation. Rachel couldn’t get on with his dad. Gemma had been bored by the lack of a cinema, or girlfriends to chat and gossip with.
Reece had realised then that when he eventually chose a wife, he’d have to find one among the girls who’d been born and bred in the bush. His needs were quite clear. She didn’t have to be great-looking, but she had to be comfortable around horses and cattle. She had to cope with hard work and isolation, and she had to have a genuine love of the outback life.
In the meantime...
He had to come to terms with having Jess Cassidy here. In his life, close at hand, day in, day out.
And what an enticing but complicated thought that was.
Jess wasn’t a girl he’d met at a party or on a beach holiday. He’d met her here, at Warringa, on a night like no other, the night her husband had died and her baby was born.
A night of incredible emotional connection.
And that was his problem. He cared too much about Jess and her cute baby daughter.
Now it was time to remember that when they left, they would take a sizeable chunk of his heart with them, just as his mother had.
It was a certainty he mustn’t lose sight of.
* * *
Jess was sure she went to sleep with a smile on her face, still in a happy swoon. She didn’t want to overthink this perfect night, so she’d deliberately shut down her thoughts, and she wouldn’t let herself ask questions or worry about it. She simply wanted to relax and absorb this new layer that had been added to the happiness that filled her life now.
As she settled into the pillow she felt more secure and serene than she had in years. Perhaps ever.
It was no surprise that she slept soundly until Rosie woke around four. Softly, she tiptoed to the kitchen, heated a bottle and brought the baby back into bed with her.
Snuggled against a pile of pillows, she made Rosie comfortable, then lay looking at her little girl in the faint creamy light that crept through the slatted blinds at dawn. She rubbed her cheek against her soft silky hair and breathed in the pink and white smell of her.
She remembered last night with Reece, and happiness bubbled through her, again. A shiver-sweet delight that had everything to do with Reece. He’d been so flatteringly passionate and yet considerate too. As a lover, he was her secret fantasy come true.
It was tempting to make comparisons with Alan, but she wouldn’t allow that. In fact, she was becoming increasingly aware now, in this new light of day, that she needed to get her head sorted.
Yes, last night was a really big deal for her. Huge. Unforgettable. But she had to remember it was a fling, not the start of a new relationship. It had been all about chemistry and it had nothing to do with deeper emotions. She was vulnerable because she’d felt overwhelming gratitude to Reece ever since the night he’d found her on the side of the road.
Looking down at Rosie again, seeing her plump cheeks and the bright concentration in her eyes as she drank, Jess remembered the promise she’d made to her daughter back in Cairns on the night Reece had come to dinner. She’d been sure then that she would get on top of their debts and build a future. Without a man.
She had
to stick to that plan. Had to do this alone.
She’d had an unforgettable night with a man who stirred her to her very soul, but it shouldn’t happen again.
It was more important than ever to remember that now.
CHAPTER EIGHT
‘I’VE been checking out your garden,’ Jess told Reece at breakfast a few days later.
He looked up, amused. ‘What garden?’
‘Near the back stairs and beside the laundry.’
‘You can hardly call that mess a garden.’
‘Well, it has potential. I know it’s mostly grass and weeds at the moment, but I started clearing a corner and I found brick edges and the start of a pathway. There’s been a garden there in the past and it’s all just waiting to be uncovered.’
Jess envied people with gardens, and, after a lifetime in rented flats, she’d been really excited by her discovery. It was like finding buried treasure. ‘Is it OK with you if I keep clearing?’
‘Sure. Be my guest.’ Reece’s dark eyes glowed with a mixture of amusement and admiration...and something else. ‘I’ll help you, if you like.’
She turned back to the stove so he couldn’t see how pleased she was. Despite her resolution to keep her distance, there’d been a happy vibe between them ever since the night they’d made love.
They hadn’t talked about it. Reece had been as careful as she was to get ‘back to normal’, but another barrier between them had definitely fallen. They couldn’t help smiling at each other now, and they were both mega eager to please.
It was a dangerous kind of limbo, a happy bubble that couldn’t hold for ever. At some stage they would have to talk about what had happened. Perhaps they were both scared? Perhaps it meant too much? Felt too dangerous, after all?
Even working in the garden with Reece would be perilously like playing Happy Families, although Jess couldn’t deny that his muscle power would be invaluable.
‘I’d actually love to grow a few vegetables and herbs for the kitchen,’ she said.
‘Great idea,’ he agreed. ‘I should have been doing that years ago, but running the cattle business has taken up most of my time. As you know, we tend to live on tinned and frozen veggies.’
‘Well, I’m happy to get it started. Pity there’s no plant nursery around here.’
Reece shrugged. ‘It’s easy enough to order seeds over the Internet, and I’ll have to take Dad back to the doctor in Cairns again soon. We can buy plants while we’re there.’
‘We? Are you planning for me and Rosie to come too?’
‘Why not? You’d like a break, wouldn’t you?’
Jess grinned at him. It was another thing to look forward to. Each day, her life at Warringa seemed to keep getting better, despite the silent, lingering question—
How long could it last?
She shook that menacing thought away. ‘Actually, I’m glad Michael is seeing the doctor again,’ she said. ‘I do feel he’s slowed down a bit lately, don’t you?’
‘Yeah.’ Reece sighed softly. ‘But he’ll never admit it.’
He stood and took his plate and cutlery to the sink. ‘We may as well start clearing the garden straight after breakfast, before it gets too hot.’ He seemed almost as keen on the garden idea as she was.
It was fun—certainly more fun than a potentially boring job like digging up weeds and grass should have been. After Jess had fixed breakfast for Michael, she set a playpen, a picnic rug and toys under a shady jacaranda tree for Rosie. Reece extracted a wheelbarrow, spades, forks and a hoe from an old garden shed, and together they set to work. Reece wielded the hoe on the tough weeds and clumps of kunai grass, while Jess prised out the roots of the couch grass runners that completely covered the path.
It was rewarding to see the growing mountain of rubbish in the wheelbarrow, while a brick-edged garden emerged beside the house, bordered by a surprisingly beautiful, old-fashioned path made from black and white bricks in a herringbone pattern.
‘This is going to be gorgeous, Reece.’ Jess was already carried away, imagining clumps of basil and rosemary, and then sage and a ground cover of oregano. Oh, and there’d be parsley, as well, and chillies. And cherry tomatoes. ‘We can have a pot of mint under the tap.’
She’d once worked in a restaurant that had its own kitchen garden, and it had become a personal fantasy she’d nursed for years. Until now it had been another pipe dream.
Amazing to think it was coming to life all the way out here. When she’d arrived at Warringa, she’d thought she’d come to the middle of nowhere. Now, this house and the land around it were beginning to feel like the centre of somewhere. An increasingly fascinating and alluring somewhere.
Jess realised Reece was smiling at her again. ‘Have you any idea how your eyes shine when you’re excited?’
‘Well, maybe they’re a bit like yours?’ she suggested shyly and, without warning, the air around them was crackling.
Their clothes and hands were grubby, covered in dirt grass stains, but it didn’t seem to matter as Reece closed the space between them and gathered her in. And Jess decided instantly that resistance was futile. She gave herself permission to forget all her questions as he kissed her.
Time stood still. She closed her eyes and his lips worked their magic and the winter sun streamed gently over them.
It was their little bit of heaven until a grouchy ‘Harrumph’ from the veranda brought them springing apart.
‘What the hell are you two up to?’ Michael roared.
To Jess’s blushing relief, Reece remained quite calm. Instead of trying to justify their kiss, he sank his hands into his jeans pockets and strolled over to the veranda. ‘Hi, Dad.’
She held her breath, waiting for Michael to demand why his son and the housekeeper were madly locking lips.
‘What’s all this mess?’ Michael demanded, with a glare and a sweeping gesture that encompassed their attempts at gardening.
‘We’re making a vegetable and herb garden.’
‘A what?’
‘A vegetable and herb garden. You know,’ Reece said patiently. ‘Tomatoes, lettuce, chives—plants we can eat.’
‘We don’t need to eat plants.’
‘Come on, Dad. Don’t play games. You know what I’m talking about. Jess wants to grow things for the kitchen. For salads and to use in her cooking.’
Michael continued to scowl. ‘This is a cattle station, not a bloody restaurant.’ He shot a surprisingly angry glare Jess’s way. ‘You’ve been doing something to those hanging baskets near the kitchen too, haven’t you?’
‘I’ve been watering them,’ she admitted. ‘But I haven’t wasted tank water, Michael. I’ve been collecting the grey water from the laundry.’ She’d been pleased with her economy and with the lovely green shoots and fronds now sprouting from the ferns’ massive, ancient root systems.
‘Don’t bother,’ Michael growled. ‘I hate those ferns. They give me the creeps.’
Reece was shaking his head. ‘Dad, those hanging baskets have had struggling ferns in them for as long as I can remember. If they gave you the creeps, you could have tossed them out years ago.’
Michael simply growled again and stomped back inside the house. Not a word about their kiss. Perhaps he hadn’t noticed?
He was more upset about the garden.
Rosie began to cry then, and Jess went to pick her up. ‘You probably need changing, don’t you, kitty?’
With the baby in her arms she turned to Reece. ‘I might see if she’s ready for her nap.’
But he hadn’t heard her. He was staring with a puzzled frown at the space where his father had stood.
‘Reece?’ Jess stepped closer.
He turned and blinked, as if he’d been miles away.
‘Is everything OK?’
‘Sure.’ He sighed. ‘I was lost in the past. Trying to remember. I’m pretty sure my mother planted the ferns in those hanging baskets.’
He hardly ever spoke about his mother, the woman who’
d left so many years ago, leaving Michael alone to raise their son.
Jess had no idea what had driven the woman away, and she didn’t understand how she could have abandoned her little boy. Just the same, Michael’s reaction to the baskets was strange. Why had he kept the plants in a half-dead state? What was he clinging to? Had he never really forgiven his wife? Was he still bitter and angry after twenty-eight years?
These were sobering questions as she went inside. But as she changed Rosie and smoothed lotion onto her soft skin, she realised it was easy enough to wonder about Reece’s parents’ relationship, but much harder to examine her own behaviour. A few short minutes ago, she’d shared another kiss with Reece in a moment of spontaneous happiness.
Why, when she’d known it was reckless? Why would she risk giving him the wrong idea when she knew she’d eventually have to leave, just as his mother had?
* * *
As Reece had predicted, the afternoon sun hit the back of the house and it was too hot to garden after lunch. While Michael and Rosie had naps, he went off to tinker with a tractor’s motor in the machinery shed, and Jess turned her attention to housework.
She was dusting bookshelves in the lounge room when she came across a particularly smart-looking photo album. As she picked it up to wipe the thick red leather binding a photo fluttered to the floor. Stooping to collect it, she saw a picture of a serious little boy with dark hair and handsome dark eyes.
He was standing at the bottom of Warringa’s front steps, dressed in smart-looking black trousers, a white shirt and a neat little striped waistcoat.
The boy had to be Reece.
Jess slipped the photo back into the front of the album, but she couldn’t help taking a peek and she soon realised that every photo in the album was very alike, with Reece standing on the front steps.
Frowning, she looked a little closer. Reece was incrementally taller and older in each photo, and he was wearing a different outfit each time. The clothes looked brand-new.
These had to be the photos of his birthday outfits. He’d told her that his mother used to send clothes for his birthday, and he would ask his father to take a photograph to send back to her with his thank-you notes.